I believe the best place for a child to grow up is at home with their mother. So many children these days don’t have the security of being with their mom during the day. They are dropped off at daycare or the babysitter’s house at 8am and aren’t picked up until 5pm. They spend the whole day with someone they have no real bond with.
I had the privilege of growing up with a mom who stayed at home and earned a living by watching other people’s children. Sometimes she would start as early as 5am and work until 5 pm. Everyday when I would wake up in the morning, there would be kids at my house. Every day when I got home from school, there would be a house full of kids. Sometimes they would stay to have dinner with us. It got very tiresome on my nerves
sometimes having to share my mom with so many other kids. My mom would joke around saying, “Brenda, I bet you’re not going to want to have any kids when you grow up.” At the time, I thought she was right. It wasn’t until I became a mom that I had the insight to fully appreciate my mom’s sacrifice. She chose to not only stay home to be there full-time for my sister and I. She was also a second mom for those other kids who had less than the best of childhoods.
She was there to console them when they were sick. She was the one who fed them their meals. She was the one who changed their diapers, fed them their bottles, and gave them their medicine. My mom was the one who kissed their foreheads and tucked them in for their nap. She saw their first smiles, heard their first words, and she was the one to praise them when they took their first steps. All of these things that my mom did for them were things their
mothers should have done. While I am grateful to my mom for staying home with me throughout my whole childhood, at the same time, I look back with sorrow over what those children did without. They saw the relationship that I had with my mom and I know they longed for that same one-on-one time with their own mom. One mother told my mom, “I don’t think it’s about quantity time. It’s about quality time. If I only see my children for a few hours on the weekend, I need to make sure I spend quality time with them.” Mothers, let me tell you, it is not about quality time! It’s about quantity!! Children spell love, “T-I-M-E.” I remember Mondays as being an especially hard day for my mom and the children. After spending the whole weekend at their own homes, most children didn’t want to accept anything less than their own mothers. Some children resigned to letting their mothers drop them off and seeing them walk out the door without letting out as much as a whimper, but other children didn’t want to give in that easy. Some of the children would hold on to their moms for dear-life, not wanting to let go. Their eyes would plead with their moms to stay a little longer. This would happen every Monday. Tuesday would be almost as difficult, but as each day would go by, the children would realize that they were going to be dropped off every morning no matter how much they objected, so they gave in to that fact. By Friday morning, there usually wasn’t any show of emotion on the part of the child. When they become parents, I wonder if they will think that that’s what childhood is all about. I sure hope not. I hope that they have the strength to stop the cycle and stay home with their children.
From the moment of conception, a baby knows who its mother is. From the time it is born, babies are in love with their mothers and desire nothing more than their mother’s constant affection and presence. Researchers believe that the first year of a child’s life sets the pace for
I understand the fact that some mothers honestly cannot stay home with their children due to the fact that they are providing for their family by themselves. Their husband either does not support them being a stay-home mother, they have had a divorce, or they are widowed. I believe in situations like this the single mother needs as much outside support and encouragement as possible. When a mother honestly has no other option but to work outside the home, then we, who are fortunate enough to stay home with our children, need to let them know we are there for them. Showing them
love and encouragement is something we are commanded to do in the Bible. James 1:27 says, "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world." The single mothers and widows who are struggling to make ends meet, and still provide a warm, nurturing home environment for their children, are going above and beyond the call of duty. Their sacrifice, hard work, and dedication will not be forgotten by the Lord. Being a full-time mother is tiring work, and it doesn't always seem like what we are doing will make a difference. Sometimes I wonder what would it be like if I worked outside of the home. I would get to bring in my own paycheck, get praise from others for a job well done, socialize with people my own age, and get a break from the monotony of homemaking. But those thoughts are quickly outweighed when I think about my precious
children spending 9 hours away from me a day. I didn’t have children so that someone else could raise them and instill their
different values on them. Our family of 7 is living well under the $30,000 per year income range, but I am not complaining. I would rather make do without a few material things and have the security of knowing that my children are being cared for by the person that knows and loves them more than any other caretaker. I believe my children are learning the value of family because of my willingness to not live an extravagant lifestyle. Sometimes I believe that the more money you make, the more problems you have. Some children grow up with parents working round-the-clock and have very little stability in their family life. Both of them work not to make ends meet, but because they want to live a luxurious life. They don't take into account that their children don't care about living in a huge house or about impressing company. What they want more than anything is to have the presence of their parents at home. If you feel like you don’t have the stamina to take care of your children 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, don’t worry. Every mother I know has difficulties at times, especially when their children are at a demanding stage. It’s at these times
especially that we need some time to ourselves. Calling on the grandparents or a close friend to relieve us of our duties for a few hours is just what we need. It won’t do yourself or your children any harm to indulge in an occasional date with your husband or enjoy a day to go shopping by yourself. But what I believe is unfair and uncalled for is a continual, daily separation and detaching to your children.
I want to be my child "Above Rubies"-A site that encourages the Christian homemaker The Crucial First 3 Years- A great article stressing the needs of a child to have their mothers at home with them MOPS- a wonderful organization for supporting the mother (Check for local groups)
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